May 17, 2014
Dear Grace,
Happy belated 12th Birthday!
I can’t believe I never finished your 11th birthday letter; it’s still in my notebook. Please accept my apology as I started the Master of Arts in Teaching program two days after your 11th birthday. Needless to say, this last year has been extremely busy, and of course rewarding as I’ve watched you and Harry grow and mature. I’ll try to make this year’s letter extra long to make up for missing last year.
You had two small birthday parties. Your birthday fell on a Sunday. Willow and Kat slept over Friday night. I’m thrilled you and Willow have become reacquainted this year in 6th grade. You and Willow were good friends in kindergarten but then once you went to another elementary school, you both ran in different circles. I reread the letter from last year (only because I never finished it) and thought more about the advice given at the time about friends. Based on incidents between Harry and Jared this year, I’d like to add one more piece of advice regarding friends: good friends respect boundaries. For example, if a friend asks you to partake in an activity you’re uncomfortable with and you decline, a true friend will not continue to push you, but will rather accept the limit you have placed. This scenario applies to boys too.
You’ve adjusted extremely well to the new environment in 6th grade. You’ve made many new friends…which reminds me to mention your second birthday party on your actual birthday. Ella, Avery, and Danielle came over for homemade mac & cheese and an afternoon hike. Snowfall was once again light this year and melted off by the end of April affording us the opportunity to hit the trails early this spring. This winter (2014) marks the third year in a row of less than average snowfall which for us, usually means a dry summer. As I write this letter, there are wildfires in the San Diego area which may force your friends, Carly and Jenna, to temporarily evacuate their home near San Diego.
Academically you have performed well. Please know that Dad and I are proud of you! You earned a 4.0 each grading period and were accepted into the National Junior Honor Society – congrats! In fact, you outperformed both Harry and me with respect to GPA’s. Harry had around a 3.7 and I currently hold a 3.9. Although, you love to remind me that my homework involves coloring! Yes, some of my homework this year did involve coloring – and you even helped me with it! Remember coloring the Mandala together? I really enjoyed that project. Mostly because I was with you and we weren’t pressured to be somewhere. We just talked, relaxed, and (yes) colored. I suspect that’s what life was like 100 years ago without technology or “things to do” that at least for me, seem to clutter my life. I do crave a simpler life, but it seems that only more uncertainty and hecticness are on the horizon. I look forward to more free time this summer since my classes are over. As I write your letter, we’re in the midst of making plans for a trip with your aunt, uncle, and cousins! I also registered you for a one-week Girl Scouts camp at the end of July.
June 7, 2014
I’m determined to finish your letter today…
Your sense of humor has come on strong this year and we find you have grown in your ability to laugh at yourself. You make us laugh on a more regular basis. I really need to jot down episodes as they occur because I often forget them by the time I write your annual letter. Although, a recent story occurred while we were visiting Gram. During dinner one evening, Aunt Donna was talking about “skipping” for exercise and you suggested she wear her hair in pigtails if she really wanted to capture a youthful look. We all (including Donna) chuckled.
On a much sadder note, Dad has had a difficult year, well, year and a half really. The cancer has spread throughout his entire chest and abdomen. He underwent chemo in the spring of 2013 which scaled back the cancer. Then in the fall (Nov. 2013) he was accepted into a clinical trial at NIH – National Institutes of Health in Washington, D.C. I believe it was scheduled to be a three-phase trial consisting of a vaccine during Phase I to induce a response of his immune system. Phase II – the anti PDL-1 trial phase PDL01 is a protein released by some cancer cells. If I understand the theory behind the trial correctly, the doctors at NIH were trying to suppress PDL-1 so the cancer wouldn’t continue to spread. However, Dad developed a bad case of pancreatitis. Plus, we never found out if his particular cell type released PDL-1 and his cancer continued to spread during the trial. He required a stent in the biliary tree duct to alleviate problems with his liver in January 2014. He’s undergone more and more chemo with marginal success but he’s feeling quite sick from the chemo. Grace, he’s fighting so hard for you, Harry, and me. He is afraid to tell you how sick he is because he doesn’t want you to worry. I’m not sure what I’ll be writing about next year with respect to Dad’s health, but one thing is clear: he loves you!
I hope you come to understand why preparing myself for another career has been so important over these last several years. In the horribly unfortunate event Dad passes away, I don’t want you or Harry to worry about who will take care of the family. While I won’t earn a huge salary as an elementary school teacher, I should be able to provide for both of you. I’ve appreciated your support while I’ve been in school AND your help with my homework! I feel truly blessed to have you and Harry as children and I thank God almost daily for the privilege and the blessing!
Love you always,
Mom p.s. Next year, I’ll have to also write about Park City Soccer Club!
